written by owen, Wed, 14th Sep
One thing I have learnt from the sea is that if you want lots of random smooth rocks you have no choice but to keep pounding the shoreline. Forever. In a constant rhythm. It helps that the ocean is gigantic and endless. The ocean is bigger than all your problems, and even the problems that you create yourself for other people.
I realize that you want to feel special like creating a world within a world which is unique and different from anything else that has ever existed for billions of years before now. Some things are bigger than the things you want. I have gone to great lengths to down play my specialties. My existence in this time and place, now, going forward is a cautious trod through a minefield of which I am very aware. I am aware of the things I do not like and the things that wake me up in a cold sweat at night. I bare them only for a time. There are things that I do not want to learn.
I try to not be too introspective in my writings lately but it is hard when I am not sure which direction my compass is heading. The future belongs to no man. I try. If you do not know me by now then you probably never will. I keep a log of the things I might forget because I surely will. It is not that I do not care to remember but mostly because there is so much to do, so much to learn and so little time is which to experience it all. I do not want to burden you with promises - a comfort.