written by owen, today at 9:56 am
The world is filled with so much wonder that there is no real way to appreciate it all. There is just too much, too many worlds. There is no way to experience it all. Some times you just have to sit back and let it all pass you by or the fear of missing out will hold you hostage forever. All you can really do is try to play your little part in this whole mess of a world. So that at the end of the day you can pull a clean sheet of paper out of your pocket and write down all you have achieved and all you have seen.
I am hesitant when it comes to certain things. My life is not a destination which I hope to reach. I avoid spending more than I earn. I try not to waste limited resources. I go to great lengths to avoid choas and uncertainty. I have seen the edge of the cliff, the rocks below and the sky above with no parachute. I am not scrolling now a list of old videos. The time is now. I must make new stuff. I must be wiser than I was yesterday. What does it profit a man to gain the world but lose his own soul?
There are some things that are obvious traps like standing in short grass in a wide field. Whether you know it or not you only have your self to blame if you fall into them without reading the manual or at least preparing yourself for the pain that will certainly come along. The best you can do is take each day as it comes and try not to kill anybody while you barrel down the road of life at a 100 miles an hour. We are all stars now, in the dope show.
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written by owen, Mon, 15th Jan at 11:34 am
Everyone has a flaw or 2. The more time you spend with people the more you know. We are flawed by nature. It is like living in a cage with a tiger. The most you can hope for is that you are not there when the tiger is hungry and has nothing else to eat. Or worst yet you decide to eat the tiger and the tiger tastes bad. You just have to do your best to understand what you are taught. Gleaming as much as you can amidst the chaos that is all around. Knowledge, wisdom and understanding.
I want to write an article about the perils of driving in Jamaica. That in fact it is not the speeding that kills but the inconsideration of people towards each other and of course the physics of stopping suddenly. But I fear that if I do this I might jinx myself and crash and die in a burning ball of flames and everyone will say that that was the guy that wrote the article on how to drive in Jamaica. I am not sure if I have already paid enough for my future sins.
It is like that time a police man made me take a bly instead of giving me a bly. To normal people this would seem fine but to me it is like giving me a cross to drag through the streets like Jesus. If someone gives you a bly there is no problem it is a like a blessing but if you "take" a bly - GOD HELP YOU! Instead of paying the price you are beholden to return the favor to someone else which is like a curse of gratitude. Its complicated, you will figure it out when you are older.
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Mad Bull commented: That bit about driving in Jamdown.... [laugh] [laugh] [biggrin] [biggrin] ... read 1 more
written by owen, Wed, 03rd Jan
Wow, 2018. We have crossed the hump and are now barrelling straight down through another set of birthdays, holidays and global catastrophes.. I thought the Christmas period would never end as I try to eat three cakes by myself. The Christmas tree is still standing because I dread the chore of taking it down and repackaging it in a box in which it will surely not fit. What is life without change?
The date for the ending of Whatsapp support for me phone has come and gone but I do not care really. Idle chatter is only going to keep me from doing what I want to do and dreaming about the future only stops you from doing what you can do now. So its back to BBM or email or phone calls. Probably I will start walking around with my camera again and updating my website more often.
I try not to be a heavy weight on the shoulders of other people. Because I am not certain of anything. Or I like to exist as a part of a greater whole and I do not want to pretend to be special. Do it for the love. Every dance might be your last so I am always cautious as a survival mechanism. Nothing really matters except for the trees that you climb, the good memories and the falls you survive.
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written by owen, Fri, 22nd Dec 2017 at 7:14 am
At times do you ever wonder if you are living someone else's life? Like you are supposed to be somewhere else instead of where you are now? Or maybe you fear that you are not yet strong enough to live that life. It does not matter. All that matters is monkeys and trees and water. Everything else is just a filter. You are already what you are going to be.
I have been posting a lot recently. Trying to make up for an entire year of slack and distraction, death and despair. I have not been getting many comments though but I am still irie. I do it for the love, not the likes. Well it could be a bug in the code that I may have missed and no one has gual to tell me about it because they fear that they may come off as stupid for asking question. News flash: there are not stupid questions - only stupid answers.
My Christmas budget is over run and its only like day 20. I am pretty much done and I hear a croaking sound in the front end that I fear to call the mechanic about. I just have to be strong and survive until at least January. But the future is yet unwritten all I can do is sit wait. No need to be complacent. You can dance, you can jive having the time of your life but I am taking it easy.
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written by owen, Mon, 11th Dec 2017 at 7:30 am
I will not be able to spend the last weeks of the year in the cold of the country because I have to work. Working through Christmas has always annoyed me to the core which is why I retreat from the hustle and bustle and the temptation to over spend to sweep leaves under a tree with no one around. Return to my used to be playground from whence cometh my health, my health cometh from the Lord.
My life is in constant conflict with perspective, past, and present. I rely on people being themselves a lot, probably too much. I assume that everyone is being their best selves at all times, doing exactly what they want to do at that very moment in time. And if not exactly then they are waiting for their moment if satisfaction tom come in short order before the world falls away. One might be playing all the angles, checking the odds or passing time. But whatever it is at that moment in time that is you - at least in my mind.
Once someone loses faith there is no going back. Wash in your old bath water. But then again faith is a matter of perspective and you have no control over which way it may go. As the world turns. Tomorrow never dies. Change is constant like Sunday morning, everything just keeps turning. What you think and how it actually is, are not the same thing but what does it matter? How you feel is drives our illusions.
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