God is a DJ

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written by owen on 2005-Nov-19.

I was watching the weather last night. checking out the weather forcaster who was wearing a black and yellow suit/thing. She looked like she was pregnant but in that hot-mother-of-your-children early pregnancy stage. The only thing I care about in the weather are huricanes but tonight the remote had died and I just sat there watching local television. I also noticed something odd. At the very point when the show ends she begins to smile. A very big smile like the one you get from the good looking air hostess on an Air Jamaica flight - right before breakfast. The kinda smile that makes you smile on the inside so hard that it flows through you like an illegal amphetamine-based synthetic drug with euphoric and hallucinatory effects or a track on the new madonna album. Then when we both realise (me and the weather forcaster) that the "cut to commercials" is taking too long and she could not hold the smile any longer. She broke her smile. It left me with a sad feeling in side.

Earlier that day I was sitting reading last last week's sunday gleaner, becuase of a flux in the space time continuum, I missed out on reading it LAST WEEK. I don't know why I buy the newspaper anyway because it really makes your fingers black with ink which transfers to everything you touch. I usually feel like I am missing out on local events, murders and competitions, so I make sure to buy it from the paper guy when he visits early on a sunday morning. Usually riding around a bicycle with really old clothes on. Hes a cool old guy. Its kinda like a subscription service without the subscription. This week I am buying the Jamaica Observer because I hate when everybody is reading the same stuff I am reading. Plus I like to live ON THE EDGE.

Usually in the auto section is a picture of car I can't buy and a full review. I scan through the auto-classifieds. Then I check out the Socials Section to see what the overly rich are doing in their non-blood-sucking time. The "careers" section has a "job-hunting while pregnant article" with a picture of a very white, very pregnant belly. The middle section has a magazine called "Outlook". The title picture is of a guy who's first name is Sunday. Further in is a article on a jamaican harp maker. There is also an entire section on the ADA motor show 2005 which I missed because I was too busy to read the paper LAST WEEK.

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  1. I hate when it blacks up my finger too. I like to read the outlookand the Business section...dont know why I reas the business section, aint helping be to be financially better off. I hardly buy the Sunday I'm not moving at this time.

    by stunner 2005-Nov-20 

  2. I used to buy both when I was in Jam. I liked the Observer more though, because of the more exciting columnists (Mark Wignall, Tony Robinson, Sharon Leach, and occasionally others)
    I alos liked the short story section of the Observer. The Gleaner was also a useful read though, so I used to get it too.
    Here in Grand Cayman, I still get them both whenever I can, but the Observer is harder to find. Also, they usually come a day late, so you're behind from the get-go, and so, plenty of times I don't even get around to reading it.
    Re the ink on fingers thing, you guys have sweaty hands or wah?

    by Mad Bull 2005-Nov-20 

  3. sweaty hands? not really

    by owen 2005-Nov-20 

  4. Without having sweaty fingers or really oily fingers, the ink seems to transfer to mine as well. And nothing pisses me off more while I am reading than that. I seem to get the most ink of a publication here in the states called 'Auto Trader' which I have been reading for sometime, due to me lacking a daily driver.

    by michael_halvorsen 2005-Nov-20 

  5. well it is recycled paper. so I say more trees for you money!

    by owen 2005-Nov-20 

  6. i tried reading the paper consistently, turned out that only worked when I was writing for the paper. Who knows y i was so excited to read an article that i already had at home for free. actually i had to read it to see if the editor did any revamping, which she had a tendancy to do.

    by alex13 2005-Nov-21 

  7. Depressed? Desperate? Not alone but lonely?It seems like... Take one of your pills or a boat and the sun will sink, upps shine again. Every month....

    by too bad (english)girl 2005-Nov-22 

  8. @too bad. what?

    by owen 2005-Nov-26