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Columbiana Movie Review

written by owen, published 2011-Sep-04, comment

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Based on the the trailor you would think that this was going to be La Feme Nikita but it is not. Seems like every movie must have a parkuor scene. Zoe zaldana plays a skinny black/white girl who grows up to be the little girl from The Professional. The movie plays into every stereotype possible - calling it simple is overstating the movie's plot. It is a movie about clueless cops that have nothing better to do that chase a revenge serial killer for 5 years only to solve the whole case in 5 minutes of stumbling across clues. It all reminds me of the movie Salt, in its need to craft unnecessary and complicated action sequences to wow the simple minded.

While I was watching the movie I hoped she would eat a hamburger or a cow or something. I can only assume she runs on solar energy. The sence of deja vu is rampant with scenes and sections ripped from the original movie. Anybody who has watched The Professional will be like "I have seen this before!".

Because the movie is PG13, most people die offscreen and there are no scenes which I would call jaw dropping, unless you enjoy seeing Zoe partially naked and barebacked. I give it 5 out of 10. Its a pretty average movie with a skinny girl kicking butt. Wait until its on cable or watch The Professional - its much better.

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TheAinzlee commented: wow dude, you smack this movie pretty hard... I shall wait until the DVD to see what's up and then we shall have a good convo ... read 4 more

Transformer: Dark of the moon review

written by owen, published 2011-Jul-17, comment

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Transformers was a pointless, leggy, souless mess but I liked the megan fox version better. I give it a 6 out of 10. I watched it in 3d but I cannot remember anything in the movie that warrented the 3d glasses. I am always in awe of people who clap at transforming robots, seriously? Megan fox looks better running in the desert in her white jeans, this new girl has long legs but cannot run to save her life, I'm surprised that something didn't fall on her. The guy sitting behind me exclaimed: "All this for one woman?". I fail to even see why they are humans in these movies anymore, dudes still shooting machine guns at robots that could easly step on them, it was all pointless. Save you money.

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Jammy commented: i fell asleep while watching it... [confused] ... read 1 more

Xmen First Class Review

written by owen, published 2011-Jun-05, comment

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I hate when reviewers come on and say that the first set of movies were wack and this new one was the best one ever! - come on dudes how do you work that logic out? How can you not like the first 4 movies in a series and start hyping up a prequel? I see lots of reviewers doing it nowadays, I don't see how you it makes sense. If you know the series and liked the first set of movies, Xmen first class will be as as predictable as it was boring.

I give it a 7 out of 10. There is at most 3 good scenes in the whole movie. If you are a fan of the previous movies and have the money to burn then wathc it otherwise wait until it comes out on cable. Its a good super hero movie, though it starts a bit slow.

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owen commented: it was a average movie and my friend micky was totally enjoying it so I would not give it a bad rating because there is nothing really bad about it. it just wasn't all it could be. ... read 9 more

Fast Five Movie Review

written by owen, published 2011-Apr-30, comment

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The name of the movie may suck but everything else is totally great. If you love impossible stunts, pretty cars, flying over the statue of Jesus Christ in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, then this show will not disappoint. This movie would have been the best in the series except it doesn't have the soundtrack of 2 but it makes up for it in terms of story. 9 out of 10. Excellent. Go watch it in the theater now. Make sure you watch the credits for a bonus scene.

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Hanna Movie Review

written by owen, published 2011-Apr-14, comment

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The best movie I've seen so far this year. Good music, good atmosphere, good cinematography, my rating 9 out of 10. Near perfect. And all those people complaining about the ending are simply haters.

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Gods Child commented: Okay. Will try to see it this weekend. ... read 2 more