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Modern life-living in the future is a money pit

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posted by owen on Wed, 17th Jan at 6:57 pm .

Seriously I cannot afford to buy the new iphone and a data plan because I have too many hobbies. Too many hobbies is like having a disease that you constantly need to buy medication to treat. A disease that never gets better because the medication has side effects. So I end up in a circle or a square or an endless shape that folds back onto itself.

I am distracted but I must have those new t-shirts that just dropped because they look and feel so awesome on the java script online start-up my friend on facebag just launched. I simply must have them but I need to get a credit card or some mobile money.

I should get 4k HDR monitor too but my computer cannot push that many pixels so I will have to wait until I can buy a new video card. Maybe I should just buy a whole new computer because since I upgraded to windows X I have been having all sorts of issues. The new computer will finally fix those driver issues and allow me to play all the free games I got on the steam summer sale on super-ultra settings. Or I could just get one of those new pro consoles? But then I would need a subscription to play online. Too many hobbies.

I could skip the iphone cult and join the Android cult but there is no guarantee that it will keep getting updates or it will not brick itself in 6 months. I have all my songs in itunes. If I go android I have to buy the absolute most expensive version on the market. Or skip the whole smartphone thing altogether but how will I get a girl if me no have a phone and whatsapp and lots of likes on instagram? I will certainly be lost without my favorite apps that allow me to follow everyone everywhere.

Worse if I have a tendency to drop phones in toilets and at a bad angle on concrete causing the screen to smash. There might be drugs available for this sickness. Or I could take up tennis to improve my hand eye coordination. Struggles. My life will be incomplete if my phone does not feel good in my hand.

Scratch all that I will just keep my old phone. Who really needs VR? And mobile data plans are too expensive, I will just get the 4k smart TV and subscribe to an online video streaming service so that I can watch movies at 4k at home in peace while paying a small fee every month. If I need data on the road all I need is to pot into a coffee shop and leech off thier free wifi. But then I will need to buy food there or they will catch on to my leeching ways.

I totally forgot that streaming 4k video is going to require a really fast home internet. hmmm. There are some good deals on broadband internet but I probably will have to get a bundle with phone+cable+internet just so that I can get decent internet speed and that will run me into even more expense and extra crap.

Better yet I could simply stick to browsing instagram on the cheapest package but I am not sure I want to stare at hyper embellished photos all day. I better avoid instagram because it is just another looker pit with auto-play video advertisements. I might not beable to resist the temptation to buy everything I see and red eye people. I just want to do my hobbies in peace without waiting 5 hours for my playstation 4 to download a 50 gig update for a game I bought on disc.

I could start a youtube travel channel or something. All I would need is a really good camera and join the gym so I can look ripped and meet a hot fashion model who has an apartment in the center of town. Get a car so I can visit all the cool places to take pictures and videos for my subscribers while I go to all the parties and make money from my side sponserships.

But alas. I got too many hobbies.


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