What are your views on Global Warming?

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written by owen on 2009-Jun-24, Answer this question⁴

Logbook » Born Slow

written by owen, published 2009-Jun-20, comment

i've been watching a large amount of the Animal Planet again. Not because none of my other movie channels are working and I haven't called the cable operator because I hate interacting with people that would allow me to live in pain and despair. Twits I'm looking at you. But mostly because I love the wonderful vistas and far-away-ed-ness of it all. I love whales and monkeys. Despite all my rage I'm still just a rat in a cage.

I keep seeing this cellphone network advertisement where the man and the woman are talking about 10 sprinkles on a cup of ice-cream. When suddenly, with the biggest, most ignorant smile on his face the husband take the jar of sprinkles and DUMPS IT ALL OVER THE COUNTER. I have never been so annoyed at anything not directly related to me as that scene. Its not as if I had to go and clean it up but its like when you watch a movie and a man gets kicked in the nuts and you feel it - even if you ovaries you should be able to relate.

I've been consistently bored lately, I'm not sure why. Maybe my head is about to explode or hurricane season taking too long to arrive. I don't believe in anything except bandwidth, All i see is HD movie trailers, I may need to go to rehab. I wanna be rich and I want lots of money. I don't care about clever, I don't care about funny. Cricket seems to be quite unpredictable today - who woulda thunket.

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How much bandwidth/calories do you eat?

on an average day

written by owen on 2009-Jun-19, Answer this question⁴

Video Blog » Warlord - A 10 year old boy declares war on the world.

written by owen, published 2009-Jun-11, comment

Warning: this video may not be appropriate for all audiences. Contains the Kurr, stone throwing, putrid things, gravy, oil pies and witchs.

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Video Games » Mario Kart Wii Sucks

written by owen, published 2009-Jun-11, comment

Here I will list reasons in my opinion why the Wii release of the popular series is probably the worst version ever;

• Bikes. Why would someone add a second type of vehicle into a game that is called Mario "Kart"? Not only that but make it so that they are faster and better handling than regular karts.

• Having 12 racers breaks the balance of the item distribution. You either have to be at the very last position or at first to be certain of what you are going to get in your item box. And even then you might get something that is of little help.
• The item distribution itself is broken. Try playing a 2 player vs match without the computer AI. What you will end up with are 2 racers trying to kill each other with bananas. If a gap is created between the players it is impossible to catch the other player because all you will get are bananas.
• Losing your hard earned item when you drop of a ledge, or get hit by lightning makes it impossible to maintain any kind of strategy when holding items or retaliating after being hit. You either got to use it as soon as you get it or pray that somebody in last place doesn't use a lightning. Item hording is a choice, removing it only make the game shallow.
• Stupid, superficial items. Why would you have a item in a game that when used has not effect on computer controlled players?
• Lack of realistic hit physics. Now I know, "realistic" may not be the appropriate word in this scenario but I remember when I hit a player with a red shell while he/she was in a power slide he would go flying off a edge into a hole. Yeah I know it is evil to do but it was fun and required exact timing. Now, nothing happens the person get hit, flies straight up in the air on the spot. Pure BS.
• Team Battles should be optional. In fact the whole battle mode is a mere shadow of what it once was.
• Blue shells that explode. I've read about this numerous times. The last thing I've noticed is that if the first place racer has already crossed the finish line then the blue shell comes after whomever is next in rank. Meaning a world of pain for those who just want to be left alone with their third place position.
• Having more over powered items in the game without removing the old items throws off the random item selection mechanic. I can't remember the last time I got a fake question mark box. While at he same time you get bananas, 3 bananas, 3 boost, single boost, gold boost, green shell, and tons of other stuff that becomes unnecessary now, because the only real item that can make you win is the Bullet Bill or Star. Every other item becomes a useless waste of space. Bomb, Green shells? useless.
• Something is off with the controls I can't really tell exactly but the rainbow track is awful to drive on.
• Poor hit detection on shells. Total travesty!
• The menus look very primitive.
• Power sliding seems to be made useless, not sure if its because of the track design or the handling of the vehicles but something is not right with it. People who can do manual power slides seems to have no advantage over the regular automatic mode.
• Tracks; I am not sure about these new tracks. They seem to interfere with the player more than necessary and have no good short cuts or places to jump across. The tracks in Mario Kart Wii seem more like site seeing trips rather than race courses. Odd bumps and distractions are all around. The Mario Track from the N64 version is probably the best track on the thing.

Basically the more you suck at Mario Kart Wii - the more you enjoy it.

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