written by owen on 2023-Apr-12.
People often think I am mean when I do not accept an "off the cuff" idea that they might have suggested. It is more often the case that I have thought about that angle before. I had arrived at a destination knowing that I would arrive there rather than spending the journey looking down at my phone. At this point in my learning I see things and I just throw them into the back of my brain and stuff comes out fully baked.
No matter where you are in life there are things that you care about that absolutely no one else has any concept of why you care about those things. It is alright. You have to be someone where you have to be something and its ok. it is ok not to like something that everyone else likes. It is ok to be the odd one out. It is ok to exist as the only king of a castle that no one wants to live in. Sometimes you have to validate your own passions because the world is full of other things.
When I turn on the water faucet there is a chance that water may not run out of it. This fills me with fear and joy at the same time. While my guitar gently weeps. the reality is that you feel the most alive when you are close to death. It doesnt matter where you are because you are always somewhere; embrace your struggle.