written by owen on 2007-Nov-17.
I know I'm not perfect but if your heart is weak I can't be the one to save you. My mother will ask me when I'm going to give her some grand children to spoil. But I'm no angel and it doesn't mean that I don't care. To know me is to love me. However I tend to avoid things that I might regret and let people die by their choosing because I can't save everybody, no matter how hard I try to save a life. I was talking to her the other night. Her life had a sudden change. While shes mine to leave or take. I imagine that the worst had happened - now I only fear is that I might impregnate a woman that annoys the hell out of me (but eventually, accidentally). I would say that I haven't found anyone thats right for the job. The how I can't recall, for those that I made the mistake of allowing in contact with my mother often led to her nagging me about the stages. Don't worry about a thing, because every little thing is going to be alright.
I've been lucky, its hard, but I'm banking on good faith and condoms, eventually where you are and where I am and where she is will be the same place. I could care less how big her butt is or how nappy her hair looks in the morning, we are all the same. When you are between unsure and a hundred there is only one place to go and that is up. No regrets, everything happens for a reason. I would have been well on my way if it had not been for the fact that getting a woman pregnant changes the dynamic of the sex all together, and she better be damned sure shes ready. Plus pregnancy just doesn't fit certain women. Some women need to be free for as long as possible. And most times I am not the man for the job. Her eggs may eat my seed. Cry not for me my willow tree.
Its not that I wouldn't love her, its simple a matter of what to pick up the supermarket. How easy it is to make her happy, satisfy her soul, what she will try to kill me with when she gets angry, warm her heart because such things are important - just as important as a pre-nup or the size of her breasts. Come to decisions quickly, change slowly. I would rather cross all the bridges necessary than jump into the water and hope for the best. Patience is a virture. Sometimes you know for sure and other times you play the game while your young and your dreams are clear and bright. I don't want to grow old, wake up the next morning, put all my cards down on the table and find that the crazy little life that we brought into this world is going to look at us and wonder - wtf.