written by owen on 2014-Feb-17.
I am never the emotional guy. The way I see it, things can always get worse - no matter how bad it is. Don't worry about me. This time around I just want to curl up in to a ball. There is nothing that can really be done. The more I sink in the sea of dispear - I need to think and thinking makes me fall deeper and deeper like swimming in quicksand. I will have to climb back out eventually but I don't know when or how. I have to struggle with the ability to let go of things that don't matter. All the shit drowns us at some point.
I hate listening to talk radio in public transport. Especially when the host likes to hear his own voice and keeps repeating the same question as if forgets everything every 10 minutes and needs to constantly memorized his own brain. Makes me want to scream at the radio; "yes, I heard you the first 20 times! Its shocking! Really I believe you!". I keep wondering if he ever runs out of things that we should be shocked about. Its all the same shit.
I am jack's wasted life. I would rather avoid certain life experiences. Even if they say they that it will make you stronger but life is heavy. There is nothing I hate more than being set back. Being set back is like digging a hole with a spoon and then having the rain fall and wash away your hard work. All and can do now is put my mind to work on something that will help me pass the wasted time.